One of the titles in my Chapters of Life entry was Rules of the House, which I will now divulge to you. I have a Halloween party coming up that I am hosting in my apartment, and I've got to admit that I'm a little nervous of what will transpire. My friends have been a bit iffy in the past when it comes to parties, and I've had to set a few House Rules. These are totally legit, by the way. No sarcasm intended.
1. Pants are optional. (This was created in college, and still stands. Make yo'self at home.)
2. Do not throw my cat. (Seriously. Why should I even have to say this? What kind of person are you? I will most certainly hold a grudge, and think less of you as a human being.)
3. Do not get drunk and break my glassware. (Okay, this was just a humorous threat, but I will still keep it nice and safe in my hutch from now on.)
4. Do not have sex on my couch. (Again.. seriously. WTF. I have a spare bedroom. Couldn't you AT LEAST use my spare bed?)
5. Friends do not ask friends for threesomes. (This should just be an unspoken rule. Why on God's green earth would you think this was a viable or even realistic idea?)
6. No smoking in my apartment or on my balcony (Management rules.)
7. PLEASE keep the obnoxiousness to a minimum. (We're not teenagers, and we do have quiet hours.)
