Just Doing Some Research..

I tend to enjoy any time I spend on wikipedia. Its usually my go-to source for anything of interest. I realize critics always say its not the most reliable site, but at the same time, I feel the things I'm researching will have accurate data for the most part. Here's the thing I love about wikipedia: Its a never-ending path to knowledge! More often than not, I go to look up one thing, then while reading I wonder about something else mildly related, click on the link, and I'm on a new topic.

Here's a good example:
-I started by looking up the Tibetan book of the Dead *inside joke at the bottom
-Then I wonder about the more famous Egyptian Book of the Dead
-Then I start thinking about how long ago Egyptians lived, and where exactly was that in the history of recorded time?
-Move to history of human evolution & various periods (Cretaceous, Paleolithic, etc.)
-A more closer look at the Pleistocene era and...

OMG THERE WERE ELEPHANT-SIZE GROUND SLOTHS!! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Megatherium

So to backtrack - I went from the Tibetan Book of the Dead to gigantic ground sloths. I consider that time well-spent.

*Now the inside joke: Last Christmas I had bought my 4 yr old niece a "fur-real" penguin that chirps, flaps its wings, and makes a gluggling sound when you feed it a bottle. I thought I'd find her a book to go along with it, so she could read about the behavior of penguins. I went on amazon and plugged in "penguin." One of the first books that came up in the list: "The Penguin edition: Tibetan Book of the Dead." Maybe not the best gift for a 4 yr old... However, my brother thought it would be QUITE interesting.

What You Cannot Decipher, I Cannot Explain

Dreams are the result of your conscious thought, memory, and perception of the world around you getting all jumbled up. At times, a frightening descent into worlds of confusion.

I can hear their voices in my head as I lay curled up unable to sleep. Eyes are shut tight and I see them clearly.

“Matthew?”

He turns his boyish frame and smiles, “Same question? Do I like to sleep? I love to sleep. Its one of my favorite things. I tend to have a time with it though, as I have a bit of a busy brain.”
Busy brain.
Busy brain.

A gray fog begins to darken inside. Busy. Two figures I cannot make out. Darker. Focusing in. Two Inuit people walking down a frozen slope to a dimly lit settlement. One is a woman. I cannot see the other’s face. Wind howling and blowing across their fur-lined hoods.

Busy. Busy.

I am riding fast through the green meadows at dusk. My horse is strong and young. The other riders are a distance behind, but I can feel them always coming closer.

This does not belong.
Still we gallop quickly trying to out race those that follow.

The Inuit people do not notice we’ve crossed paths. We’ve crossed briefly through their world. They are walking toward a small mining town. They have come on serious business. It is night.

Galloping. Galloping. Towards a tunnel half-lit by the setting sun. Where he stands in a shallow trickle of water. I am trying to escape. I know he’s waiting, but I cannot stop. I’ve been here before. He is never pleased with me. Color drains. Darkness. Gray. Fur against the bitter cold.
I am afraid.

There is a far-off disruption. Bars of distraction, cutting. Slicing. There is the briefest jolt, and everything is black. Vanished. There is a bright light, and everything comes together at once.

Our group has come to rest in an old rundown village. I wake grimy and worn like everyone else on the bus, and stumble out into the wilderness. As was with our journey thus far, everything is overgrown and the air is thick and muggy. Straight ahead is a rundown old mission church where some of the others head to take shelter, but I follow Simon as he begins to wander off in the direction of a wooded area, which looks to have been a park. The bugs become worse as we walk further under the trees, and I swat at my sticky hot skin in annoyance.

“Simon. Where are you going? You should know by now its not safe to wander into unknown areas.” I call after him as I stomp through the tall grass and weeds.

Smack. Another bug. I curse under my breath.

“Simon!” I call again, and look up to see he has stopped in a clearing by an old park bench. He stretches long and lazily before lounging across the seat and pulling his tatter baseball cap down over his eyes. I glare, and began walking again.

“What do you think you’re doing?” I demand once I have reached the park bench. He waits a moment before peeking out from beneath his cap.

“hmm?” is all his response.

I am none too pleased. “What are you doing?” I repeat, “You know we shouldn’t be far from the others. Anything could happen.” He grins.

“Oh, you’re too worried. Its just a game. There’s nothing to be afraid of.” And with that he folds his hands behind his head and closes his eyes.

“You’re crazy! What do you think happened to Sid and Chloe? How can you say its just a game?” I try to hide the tremble in my voice, but gasp as I catch sight of a dark figure in the trees. He hasn’t seemed to notice.

“Simon, something is not right here. We’ve got to go back with the others.”

A clap like thunder. Splitting through time, and everything goes black, momentarily. When I look around again, Simon is gone, and the park is dotted with people strolling around. I hear a shriek in the distance coming from down a running path. An animalist noise that sends shivers through to my core. I recognize no one, but start running. On the path are block racers. Strange men in white protective suits driving tiny little carts. Every inch of them glows. I manage to catch up to one and inquire about the creature in the trees. Has he seen Simon? They point ahead. I begin to run.

Suddenly everything is black and cold, and I don’t dare go any further. I know it in my gut. They have gotten him. There is nothing I can do for Simon now, and I have to get out of there while I have the chance. I turn and start running as fast as I can, though I might as well be blind. I can’t see anything but somehow manage to keep to the path. Gradually I begin to pick up the faintest traces of image around me, and I continue to run. They. It. Something is back there, and I have to get away. I start to come back upon the block racers, and just manage to miss them all. They are not afraid. Whatever IT is. It cannot hurt them.

Wanderer

Wanderer

I see you in the half light of the moon
that peeks out through the thick veil of clouds
rolling o’er the mournful gray skies of early winter.
You, down the old cobbled streets, amid shadows
pitched from dirty alleyways - which hang and shiver
in the recesses of the night - as you wander in thought,
your coat collar pulled high against the chill.

And I have known the insatiable craving
- the ravenous creature seeping through your veins
I have seen your eyes go black, your hands stray,
your senses overpower – like a dog, trapped, panting
in the musty corners of a dim backroom -
You have nowhere to turn for relief.

Yet I can hear them echo all around you -
the whispers that distract you, the words
that petition you, the voices that beg, but cannot reach you.
The demand for something more than your faltering demeanor.
A misconception, a rising madness – that which threatens
to drown a voice, a dream that pulls in fated heartache.

From the deep swell of the sea it is calling:
the humanity gnawing in the pit of your stomach -
burning and rolling to a yearning – a meaning
to the motives, an outcome, a deliverance.

I am but bark, caught in the willows of an inlet sea
but if you sing, you sing for me – they cannot be silenced
Your feral cry resounds with one great breath
roaring o’er the open plains to where I rest

I see you on the edge of a bare, mown field
that sleeps in silence under a cold, heavy blanket
that listens to your soft breath, and the rustle of your shoes
that cradles and holds you in familiar solitude

Winter Survival Guide

It never ceases to amaze me at how many people who have lived in the Midwest their whole lives become shocked and annoyed at the weather. I also see those around me already dropping like flies with seasonal colds and flus. I used to be like them. I'd get sick so easily and it took me forever to get over it. So, I thought I'd share some helpful hints on how to survive the cold, harsh winter.

STAY WARM! It is appalling to me what people think they can wear not only out in the elements, but even in a cold house, and think it won't affect their health. I used to say if I went outside without a hat on for 5 minutes, I'd get a cold. Its not too far fetched. Both your head and your feet act like thermostats for your body. Wear a thick hat that is big enough to cover your ears, a scarf if your neck is exposed, and socks/shoes that are insulated enough to keep your feet toasty. At home I always wear either wool socks or slippers that come up to my ankles. I also rely on everything "down" (or synthetic down, in my case.) Down throw for the living room, a down comforter for my bed, and a down coat so I don't feel anything when I go out. Keep yourself warm, or your body will react to the cold with a fever!
Extra Tip: If you find yourself succumbing to the cold air, and you're craving some sun and warmth, try hitting the tanning bed for even just 5 minutes a week. It will give you a good dose of vitamin D, and warm up your cold little body. Also, as long as you are in good health, a massage (esp. hot stone) will give your circulation a good boost.

GET YOUR VITAMINS!
You know why you're so susceptible to getting sick? Maybe your immune system is running slow. Get a good multi-vitamin for coverage, and be sure to add Vitamin D during those winter months. I take Reliv year-round. Not trying to sound like a commercial, but if I stop taking it for a few days, my body starts to feel it. Its a powder vitamin mix, so all the nutrients are readily available to your body - unlike a pill which really only does the minimum. Vitamin D3 supplements are highly recommended during the months when we're inside, and the sunlight is low. Our bodies aren't exposed to the right elements to make enough, and not only is our immune system affected, but sometimes our mood (Seasonal Affective Disorder.)

BE COMFORTABLE
You've probably noticed that the cold air and central heat tends to make everything dry. If you have trouble with dry skin, dry sinuses, chapped lips, there's a couple of things you can do. First of all, get a humidifier. Cold air doesn't hold moisture well, and your central heating is like blowing a hair dryer through the house. Next, I always change over to goat milk soap during the colder months. You can feel the difference almost immediately after using it the first time. No more tight or itchy skin! If you need to use lotion (esp. on hands) use an organic or natural lotion without anything like mineral water, alcohol (seriously??) or other drying chemicals. That just makes sense. Same with lip balm/chapstick. I love anything Burts Bees. For dry, uncomfortable sinuses, you can try 2 things (besides the humidifier): Omega3 Fatty Acids as a supplement to keep your membranes healthy, and a saline spray to keep your nasal passages moist.

SO! YOU'RE SICK:
Well, if you're like me, you can feel it coming on. My feet always start to get cold, even in boots, and I get that "swelling feeling" in my head. So, what do you do? Take care of it NOW! Don't wait and see how it goes. You want to stop whatever is developing in its tracks and get your body back into balance. First, I always make sure to bundle up my feet. Remember that I said your feet are like a thermostat for your body? If you're beginning to get sick, you don't want your body to have to fight off the cold even more. Also, to me its a sign that your body has come unbalanced. All the heat has gone up to your head/chest to fight off whatever is beginning. If you warm your feet, mild circulation can aid in the process of recouperation.
 *However, DO NOT get a massage when you're actively sick... even if you don't think its much of anything. That level of circulation will just spread the virus through your lymph system & you'll feel much worse in a day or two. A good therapist won't even allow you to get one if you have a cold. If you've had a remnant cough for a month, and nothing else.. then, maybe.

Next, pump your body full of goodness (that reads weird.) Boost your immune system w/ vitamin C. Drink orange juice, eat grapefruit, take supplements! Get some zinc drops for another pick-me-up. And my favorite trick to stop a cold in its tracks is Yogi Peach Detox tea. That's my chosen brand, but anything with spicey roots and herbs should do the trick. Ginger root is a healing must. Cardamon and cloves are warm herbs that really kick your body into gear. Again, your body is reacting to the cold. HEAT IT UP and restart your sluggish circulation! (Listen, if my dad willingly drinks it to get rid of his cold, I think you can take the advice as well.)

IN RETROSPECT, below is a list of must-haves that I've compiled for the winter. I used to feel so achy and cold all the time, but over the past few years, I've come to love this season. You've just got to prepare yourself with the right armor! Don't be one of those miserable members of society that constantly complains. You're stronger than that!

Layers
bootie slippers or wool socks
afghans and/or down throws
down comforter or electric blanket
down coat & warm hat, scarf
space heater
humidifier
goat milk soap
natural/organic moisturizer & chapstick
snow boots
vitamin D3 & omega3, vitamin C
hot, spicy, herbal tea

*A few no-brainer reminders: Drink lots of water, stay active, get enough sleep, don't continually get hammered and wander into the night alone.

Witness Meets the Trenches

One of those bizarre dreams...

I was at some kind of event in a school gym, and was helping to take care of some kids. I told one of the little boys to come sit with me. He didn't seem to want to be around us, and away from his dad, but I told him he should stay close, and he finally came over. After awhile we decided to get up and walk around. We went into this hallway off the side of the gym, and ran into a small group of men in the middle of an argument. One of them was the boy's dad, and the boy tried to break away to run to him. I realized they were arguing over some kind of illegal deal, and I grabbed the boy to keep him from interrupting. They'd seen us though, and one of them pulled a gun on us. I pulled the boy close to me, and moved him around behind me. I was thinking about how those people in movies kick the gun out of the bad guy's hand, and would that really work? Just then the boys dad pulled a gun on the first guy, and we started to back away. They argued a bit more, the first guy made a sudden move, and the dad ended up shooting him. There was a lot of blood, and I knew he was dead. I grabbed the boy and started to run.

Somehow we ended up in a small group of people from the event, who had all witnessed a part of the murder. We were being taken somewhere safe and hidden away from the people looking for us. I knew the boy's father would come after us, and I wanted to keep the boy far away from him, to keep him from harm and also from finding out what kind of person he was. The man who seemed to be in charge was leading us through a forest and down into a big field where there were trenches cut out, but made so they weren't visible to someone scanning the land. We traveled toward the very end of one, where we realized there were enclosed security bunk rooms down deep inside. The 4 of us girls were in the first half, and the 4 guys were in the second. The other girls had single cots or bunks, but there was one bed that they gave to me, so the boy could rest. We were bored a lot, and I tried to keep the boy entertained. He was chubby and cute, and had become attached to me.

After what seemed to be a long time, there hadn't been any word from the outside. We were running low on food, and the guys decided they wanted to venture out to find something. Other people stationed further down in the trenches often moved along the corridors outside the bunk rooms, and gathered to talk for entertainment, but we had tried to stay hidden, b/c we didn't know who we could trust. I didn't want them to go out. It wasn't safe for them, and it certainly wasn't safe to risk anyone finding out where the boy was. I motioned over to the bed where he was curled up asleep. They said I was being ridiculous and that they'd be careful, and went out. Awhile later when a couple of them had returned, we heard someone approaching. It was from the end of the trench where no one else lived, so we were very nervous that a stranger had found us. I had the boy hide in a cupboard in the corner of our room, and I stood flat against the wall, out of sight. Someone banged on the door on the guy's end, and we didn't recognize the voice. They demanded to be let in, and one of the guys finally tried to nonchalantly cooperate. There were 2 strangers and they began roughly searching the rooms. Before they came into ours, I grabbed the boy and slipped out our door. We started running down the trench to the end, and climbed out, hoping to find the man who brought us there.

The rest is a bit foggy, involving a jeep and a beach house that some of our group was using to hide out in. The dad finally found us, and while fighting him below, and finally killing him, I thought the boy had been thrown from the balcony. I ran over, absolutely devastated thinking MY boy was dead, but realized it was a decoy, and ran up the stairs sobbing with joy that he was alive. At that point we noticed the dad struggle to his feet, and I grabbed the boy and jumped in the jeep with 2 of the guys from my group. We sped off, trying to get away from the dad, and back to our trenches where the man in charge was waiting to help.

Most Recent Addition

My first attempt at Acrylic:

For Your Enjoyment..

Far Away, Close in Heart (playlist)

The Window is the Door - Maritime
Here I dreamt I was an Architect - The Decemberists
Misery is a Butterfly - Blonde Redhead
The Song Was Right - Old Canes
Girls of Wild Strawberries - Guided by Voices
Jesus, Etc. - Wilco
On the Surface - Civil Twilight
The Falling Kind - Vedera
Don't Think Twice, Its All Right - Bob Dylan
Landlocked Blues - Bright Eyes
Feeling the Pull - The Swell Season
Conversation 16 - The National
I Wonder - Chris Isaak
What Am I to You? - Norah Jones